Every year people are excited about the New Year. It’s a time of renewal and it feels hopeful and powerful. I love people’s attitudes around the New Year. All of a sudden we all are discussing the things I love to talk about daily such as our goals, dreams and positive ways of thinking. My main issue with this is by Feb. 1st, 80% of people give up on their New Year Resolutions, resulting in a not so successful year. Why set New Year Resolutions without a detailed plan on how to execute them? If everyone could maintain his or her New Year momentum throughout the year, the world would be a much better place. Here are ten habits to adopt to thrive in 2020.

1. Self reflect 

Analyze your past performance. You can’t map out where you’re going without knowing where you’ve been. Through journaling you can really figure out where you’re messing up in life and what you need to fix about yourself to get where you aspire to go. I recommend writing things down physically but if you don’t enjoy writing things down, you can type them up, or make voice notes on your phone. Find a method that works best for you.

Journaling can be very therapeutic. It’s important to be honest with yourself writing down where you think you thrived throughout the day and where you could have been better. This is a fantastic way to keep yourself accountable. I enjoy reading my entries and identifying my patterns. Things become clearer when you have them written down and can track your progress and connect the dots. As Steve Jobs said, “You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.”

2. Map out your success plan for the year

Create a list of all the things you want to accomplish in your life. That may sound daunting but try it and write down what comes to mind. Time yourself so you don’t spend all day writing. Next, narrow down the top 5 things you wish to accomplish. Those 5 will be your big goals for 2020. You will then create monthly goals to accomplish those top goals, then weekly goals to accomplish your monthly goals, then daily goals to accomplish your weekly goals. The point is to start small then get more granular as you go.

If you struggle with the next steps for something like I often do. Don’t get bogged up on knowing exactly what to do next. Do some research and make an educated guess, you can always revise your goals where you see fit. A simple example of this goal is:

Main Goal: Save $25,000 in 2020.

Monthly Goal: Save $2,084 per month

I find it easier to break down the smaller goals because it seems less overwhelming. So you’ll see that my weekly and daily goals are much more detailed.

Weekly Goal: Save $521 per week.

I can achieve this by saving X amount from my check from my job, selling X amount of Finesse Fitness Bottles, conducting X amount of brand partnerships etc.

Daily Goal: Eliminate X amount of unnecessary expenses.

I can achieve this by writing down how much I spend each day in my planner to keep track, making all my meals instead of ordering out, setting daily spending budgets, sending X amount of emails to brands, freelance writing for X amount of publications, marketing X products to sell X amount etc.

3. Rid yourself of negativity

I often see quotes on Instagram talking about rid negative people out of your life, I definitely agree with those quotes but also it’s imperative to take responsibility for the negativity you bring into your own life. If you find yourself angry often, easily annoyed or down on yourself and the world, it’s time to rid yourself of negative emotions that may have turned into negative habits. One thing I’m working on accepting is that I’m responsible for every aspect of my life. No one is coming to save me. This life is 100% my responsibility. Feel the anger then let it go. Emotions only last for 45-90 seconds. All the time after that are you processing the emotion. You have the power to decide to release the emotion and move on. 

If you’re unhappy with someone and can’t find a resolution, leave. If you hate your job, find another one or create one you love. If you don’t like your friend group, make new friends. Fear of the unknown is the only thing stopping most of us from positivity changing our lives. Stop making excuses, stop letting other people’s opinions dictate how you feel, and avoid bad influences. Do what you say you’re going to do and be grateful. Confidence comes from keeping the promises you make to yourself.

4. Make yourself a priority

Say no when you know you should. Stop people pleasing and feeling bad for others when you should be choosing yourself first. I know this will sound selfish to some but think of it this way; you cannot serve from an empty vessel. It’s vital to get yourself together before you give your all to someone else because then you’re serving his or her mission while neglecting yours. Self-love is prioritizing your happiness and well being by practicing good self-care, setting boundaries, forgiving yourself and living intentionally. It’s great to tell yourself that you love yourself. I spent two years ending each of my journal entries with “I love you Sade,” and that small practice helped me increase my self-love.

5. Find an accountability partner 

This is not just a friend you tell your goals to once. This is someone you share your goals with, plan and share benchmarks with and someone who checks in with you periodically. This person must be dedicated to helping you keep your commitments. I suggest you become accountability partners with each other, that way it feels like a fair exchange for both of you. Plan your checks in’s and take them serious like you would a business meeting.

6. Invest in yourself

Your relationship with yourself is the longest and most important one you’ll ever have. You can be actively working on yourself and be proud of who you are, simultaneously. Eat healthy, workout, practice meditation, read books, watch motivational speakers, take courses, explore culture, do something creative. When you actively work on yourself and step out of your comfort zone, you’ll see how much your well-being and mindset becomes better.

7. Manage your time by establishing routines

Routines are life changing! They are also super difficult because it requires you to develop a new habit, which can take anywhere from 21 to 254 days to form. First you must determine what you want to get done then you figure out how you’re going to executive it. For instance, my weekday morning routine consists of drinking a 160z glass of water as soon as I wake up. I also make sure to open my blinds as sunlight wakes up your body. Next, I write 10 things I’m grateful for in my gratitude journal and then I write about how I’m feeling and what my intentions are for the day in my regular journal.

After that I set three priorities for the day, and I structure my day hour by hour as best as I can. Since I work at a corporate job, my daytime hours can be unpredictable so I make sure to adjust as needed. Lastly I do 20 pushups or jumping jacks and start getting ready to conquer the day. Test-drive your new routine, see what feels good for you and adjust as needed. If you need help structuring your day, feel free to email me at thefireinsidesade.com and we can set up a time to discuss further.

8. Start seeing a therapist

You go to the doctor and the dentist to maintain good physical health why not see someone to maintain good mental health.  Therapy has been life changing for me. When I first started going, I was so uncomfortable and didn’t want to share my deeper emotions. But I realized doing that was only cheating myself because I was paying for this service. In my first couple of sessions where I truly started opening up I would be crying throughout the session. But after a while, I noticed that I could talk about things that once made me cry my eyes out without shedding a tear. I started to identify my patterns and I felt freer emotionally. I still have things I need to work through but I’ve seen tremendous change in the last 7 months. I highly recommend investing in therapy, everyone can benefit from therapy.

9. Network with like minded people

You have to mix with successful people; you cannot hang out with people going nowhere and expect to go somewhere. Attend meetups, networking events like the 2020 Vision Brunch that my boyfriend and I are hosting where you can meet other people interested in personal growth and learn goal setting and mindset strategies to help you advance faster. Join online communities that focus on your interests. If you’re interested in writing, meet other writers. If you want to lose weight, meet people who are conscious about their diets and exercise. Accomplishing goals is much more fun when you have people to share your progress and struggles with.

10. Try new things

New activities provide a way to exercise different parts of you and develop new skills. You could be a master painter but have no idea because you’ve never painted before. Create a bucket list and start planning days to accomplish things on your list. Do more things that scare you because the more you do those things, the less scared you become. I love to travel and people often ask me how I go to places where I don’t speak the language. And I laugh because it’s not impossible to travel around a place where you don’t speak the language; it’s actually really fun. Once you’ve pushed yourself to do it one time, it then becomes way less scary.

Happy New Year!

Sade